1
Task-1
Let's Learn from Others' Mistakes
Common Errors
1
Source: Mr Sukhman Preet Singh 16-05-24 MT 39
Original Text
The provided bar graph meticulously illustrate the proportion of male and female in employment in Canada, South Korea, and Sweden in the years of 2005 and 2015.
Corrected
Errors:
- meticulously illustrate
- in
Corrected version:
The provided bar graph meticulously illustrates the proportion of male and female in employment in Canada, South Korea, and Sweden for the years 2005 and 2015.
Improved
Improved version:
The bar graph meticulously illustrates the employment ratios of males and females in Canada, South Korea, and Sweden, comparing the data from 2005 and 2015.
2
Original Text
Regarding the year 2005, the percentage of male employees was almost 60%, while female employees were just near 40% in Canada. South Korea was provided 75% jobs for their male employees, and the number of female was 30%. Further, almost 80% men of Sweden were eligible for occurring the jobs, and the number of women was almost 35% less than men employees.
Corrected
Errors:
- was provided
- was
- men of Sweden were eligible for occurring
Corrected version:
In 2005, the percentage of employed males was almost 60%, while that of females was just about 40% in Canada. South Korea provided jobs to 75% of its male population, while females accounted for 30%. Moreover, in Sweden, almost 80% of men were employed, with the number of women being almost 35% less than that of employed men.
Improved
Improved version:
In 2005, Canada reported employment rates of nearly 60% for men and 40% for women. In South Korea, 75% of men were employed compared to 30% of women, while Sweden saw 80% of men in employment, with women's employment being 35% lower.
3
Original Text
Turning to the year 2015, the percentage of men employees was the same in Canada and Sweden, it was 70%, whereas women had the lowest percentage, it was just above 50% in both countries. In contrast, South Korean women who were working was only 35% compared with the percentage of men which was almost double at over 70%.
Corrected
Errors:
- was the same in Canada and Sweden, it was
- it was
- were working was
- was almost double at over
Corrected version:
For the year 2015, the employment rate for men stood at 70% in both Canada and Sweden, while the rate for women was just above 50% in these countries. Conversely, in South Korea, only 35% of the working population were women, in comparison to men, whose rate was well over 70%.
Improved
Improved version:
In 2015, both Canada and Sweden saw a 70% employment rate for men and slightly over 50% for women. South Korea, on the other hand, had a stark contrast with only 35% of employed individuals being women, against a significantly higher 70% for men.
4
Original Text
Overall, the employment rates of men was always greater than women in every country. However, canadian women in employment had the highest percentage in the second bar graph.
Corrected
Errors:
- was always greater than
- canadian
Corrected version:
Overall, the employment rates of men were consistently higher than those of women in all countries. However, Canadian women had the highest employment percentage shown in the second bar graph.
Improved
Improved version:
Overall, men consistently outpaced women in employment rates across all countries. Notably, Canadian women achieved the highest employment rate among their counterparts in the second bar graph.